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I think I spent all my life making for an invisible eye. A future eye. I think that eye is digital now. Not like a computer dystopia. Still, what will sort my experiance in the afterworld is a digital archivist. 

It was interesting today, a thing I heard on the radio. About a computer program that could construct a face from a dna string and it is very similar to the person carrying the dna it is made from. Wouldn't it be amazing if that process could be reversed. That an image could be read into DNA and constructed to reality. What would an image feel if it was a real thing? It's psychology. If "The Scream" by Munch would be a human, probably it wouldn't be filled with horror. Maybe it would be similar to Munch. I'm getting carried away with my fantasies. 

I went to see the an exhibition about Egypt and Cyprus objects in ancient times today. The Cyprus ones where amazing. Such fantastic faces the sculptures carried. Very distinct noses and bulging eyes. Razor sharp lips. Round faces with the most divine skin. I want to make faces like this. Almost alien but still somehow caricatures. 

I feel quite alone at the moment. I long for children. Someone to share bed with. A normal life. Financial security. 

I wish I would not want art in my life. That I could just work for money. On and on and on until I die.